Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
