The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i think i have herpe
just one?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Randomize
