I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize