Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
