David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
