another moral hangover. fuck.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
