I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
