Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
