Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
