you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize