Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Success! We fucked roommates!
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Text me some of your sweat
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