a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
