Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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