just come out here and I will go home with you...
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
