ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
