Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
