I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
