I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Randomize
