if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
you traded sex for a burrito?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
