I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
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