am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize