you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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