dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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