Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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