Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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