i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Panties = found
Randomize
