I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
the day after is always just damage control
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Randomize
