That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
this will be a night to untag.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
