We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
