Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
