Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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