Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Alive.
So much puke
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
