Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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