I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
