The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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