I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
