My brain says no but my pants say off.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
