Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
