After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize