I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
