3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize