In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
