She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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