i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
