Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
