too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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