well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
