dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
