Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
It's just like the Real World with babies
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
