Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
