did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
