I cannot find my penis.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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