i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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