Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
